How to speak from the grave. Really.

When you die ... you're dead. 

Most of us have lost someone and then wished, fairly desperately, that we could hear something from the one we lost. Just one more thing. We can't. When we die, it's all done. 

As I go through my life, finally figuring things out, achieving my small victories, I find myself imagining that somehow I'll share all this with the ones who follow ... my kids, grandkids, their kids and grandkids. All the stories, the hard-won advice, the warm words. 

There is a way to do this but you have to do it now. It's no good if you wait. It's called a memoir. Don't let that scare you. It's just a bit of remembering or story-telling that will linger after you're gone.

As simple as writing a letter.

Some people sit down in front of a video camera ... a smart phone works. Or they record audio, or ... heaven forbid ... they sit down to write.

It's not difficult. Think of writing a letter. You can send them now or, if it suits you, have them delivered after you've gone. 

What to write about? Family stories, history ... the things you already know people get confused about. "Why was Grandpa in prison?" 

It's your one best chance to have the last word about something, if that's important. 

Sometimes photos are a good jumping-off point. Pull out a collection of the ones that need explaining, maybe number them, and begin explaining. Who were these people and why are they all naked ... or whatever ... so that after you've gone on, people can make sense of who you were and why you were here. And who they are. 

A memoir is not an autobiography

So what is a memoir? Just an episode. A memoir is just one small part of the whole picture of your life. It can be quick, easy and painless. You don't have to do the whole thing from A to Z. 

You already know where to start ... with those stories you find yourself telling after dinner, around the table or the campfire ... "tell the one about ..." 

Start with that one. "The one about ..." 

But, life is uncertain. Start today.